Handling things

I am handling everything unusually well. I don't know if it just hasn't hit yet or what. I have lost it a few times but I am keeping it together better than I thought that I would. I thought that I would be an emotional wreck with this loss, but I haven't been, don't get me wrong I am sad and angry and all of that, but I am trying to stay strong. I have broke down a few times but I just don't think it has completely hit yet. I have a feeling when I return to counseling or to my psych after the first of the year I am going to lose it completely.